“Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.”

That quote seemed like a perfect example of what we've been learning in this class. You've got to have conciousness of self and congruence before you start changing the world. You've got to know who you are, what your goal is, and live life with integrity, loyalty and honesty.

"How do we come to value things in our lives?" Well, usually our values are people / topics / traits that are most important to us that affect us daily. Values are things we appreciate, have a desire to hold on to, and when they disappear we strive to get them back.

Okay, so maybe the last part didn't make sense. You can lose your values? Well, I meant that as....say I value my friendships. If I lose a friendship, for some odd reason (let's say I got in an argument with my best friend), I'd try really hard to resolve that conflict. With this, I strived to get my friendship back in order to keep my values alive. In a perfect world, my words and actions would have aligned with my values (congruence!), so I would have never said anything that would have negatively impacted a friendship. But hey, we're not all perfect.

A value is something that is desirable and wanted (family, friends, education). It is also something that shapes our actions, beliefs, thoughts and behaviors. Values explain why we do what we do.

"How can we ensure that we are spending our time on the things we value?" Well, the easiest way would be to do a self-check! IN OTHER WORDS: stop the car and check the engine!

Let's start with last night. What'd you do? Did you ditch your best friend who called you on the phone in tears to go to the bar with your boyfriend for his roommate's birthday? Or did you go over to her place and cheer her up? Obviously this isn't applicable to everyone, but in this example choice 1 would NOT be following the value of friendship or helping others (if those are 2 things you value, which I hope!).

Once you've evaluated your actions from today, yesterday, and this week....you can go back and evaluate your behavior from the past month, quarter and even year! Having a hard time remembering? Ask for feedback! Ask those closest to you if they believe you are living your values. How can you be more in tune with what you value the most? They'll be able to tell you.

At the end of the day, you're not really living life happily unless you follow your heart and do what you believe is best based on your feelings, thoughts and personal values. Don't let other people pressure you to change who you are. Be yourself!

My Personal Vision Statement

As I start to write this vision statement I'm listening to calm, relaxing music (because I feel like crap!). Inspired to look for music about this prompt I stumbled upon Stevie Wonder's "Visions." It actually turned out to be pretty relaxing....if you like Stevie, take a listen.

I really like the lyrics,

"But what I'd like to know

Is could a place like this exist so beautiful

Or do we have to find our wings and fly away

To the vision in our mind ?

If everyone put their vision statement in action, a beautiful place could really exist and the positive place wouldn't be a fantasy anymore!

I read that one's life has a "number of important facets or dimensions, all of which deserve some attention in your personal vision statement." These include but are not limited to physical, spiritual, work/career, family, social relationships, financial security, mental improvement and attention and fun. In considering all these facts of life, I need to understand who I want to become in order to create my personal vision statement. This shows how congruence and consciousness of self are extremely important.

My own personal vision statement includes living each day to the fullest; sharing knowledge to the best of my ability; having a positive impact on every person with whom I come in contact; living daily a life dedicated to integrity, commitment, challenge, and joy; loving my boyfriend and valuing our relationship; valuing close friends (+ my sanz!) and sorority sisters locally and nationwide; valuing family relationships; being at all times aware of and engaged in my natural environment; never straying away from my true character, enjoying life through the activities I find most fun.

Living this vision statement will allow me to structure my actions and focus my goals/intentions for the future. It will also allow me to live positively and peacefully in terms of my internal interactions and those with others.